When ending a marriage, many couples don’t realize they have any options outside of the highly publicized litigable method of separation. In practice, options outside of litigation may be highly preferable to the often highly destructive and emotionally charged court battle.
Outside of divorce litigation, couples have two options. The first, annulment, is very specifically legally defined and only applicable to a small percentage of marriages. Annulment is typically only available to parties whose marriages have been either illegally or improperly conducted, as in the case of bigamy or to facilitate fraud, or for parties who are deemed incapable of performing as needed in a partnership, as in the case of those incapable of consummating a marriage.
The third option is a process called mediation. Mediation involves the use of a neutral third party to guide the couple through the process of separation, divvying up assets and resources and facilitating negotiations over items of interest such as spousal support and custody over children.
Mediation is typically a much smoother and more constructive process than traditional divorce litigation, since parties are not incentivized to fight tooth and nail over every item. Mediation turns the zero-sum game of divorce into a cooperative and amicable separation, where each party leaves the relationship with their bridges intact.
The key to a successful mediation process is the mediator themselves. No matter how amicable the parties may be, the act of separating is an inherently emotional event and it’s easy to succumb to the baser aspects of our souls as we see items and people stripped away from us.
For southern California readers who are in the process of separating from their spouses, this means getting in contact with Colleen McNamee, divorce expert and mediator. She has been working with couples during the darkest and most stressful periods of their lives for decades, and yet has managed to accrue an astonishing number of glowing testimonials from her clients over the years.
A few short examples from her Google page:
“As a financial planner, I see my clients go through a number of changes in their lives and sometimes it includes a separation/divorce. Mediation is the far better option when dissolving a marriage as it puts a lot less strain not only on the finances but also the emotions of everyone involved. This is where Colleen McNamee stands out. As an attorney-mediator, she is extremely knowledgeable in her field, has two decades of experience, but also truly cares about her clients. Something that cannot be taught in law school is the gift of empathy and caring for others, which translates into achieving fair and equitable results for couples. Thanks to her very strong skill set and the services she’s able to offer, she remains a neutral counsel to both parties throughout the process, and the Agreements she drafts are far superior to any other divorce mediator I have seen! My clients have come out feeling like they were treated fairly, received their equitable shares, and can now move forward with their lives onto their next chapters.”
Katerina Hencova
“I have known Colleen McNamee for over two years and I love how she handles people who are having marriage problems. She is always interested in what is best for everyone involved, especially for any children. Sometimes, it’s a “marriage contract” that she draws up to help people stay together amicably instead of getting a divorce. If divorce is the only option, then unlike a contentious court divorce with attorneys pitting spouses against each other in public and draining the couple’s bank accounts, Colleen can get couples working together for the best solution, at far lower cost, and it’s a private matter. I highly recommend her services, and so do people who have gotten divorces through her because they often talk about how she made it so much less stressful than a courtroom divorce.”
Gregg Hill
You and your partner may not be right for one another, but that doesn’t mean you want to destroy the lives and family that you’ve built together. For those of us who do not want to burn our bridges, choose the third option of mediation, with Colleen McNamee.
McNamee Mediations
+19492233836
4590 MacArthur Blvd Suite 500, Newport Beach, CA 92660
As long as there will be marriages, there will also be divorce. The universe has a way of balancing things out like that, though divorce itself has not always been an equitable outcome.
Throughout most of recorded history, divorce has favored the male half of the population, casting a negative light over the female half if proceedings are undergone. In recent years, it can be argued that men have been given the short end of the stick, as most alimony and child support costs are borne by them while simultaneously restricting their access to their children.
Equitable outcomes are always desired, and divorce court is often incapable of providing such outcomes. Lawyers play a game that allows them to suck as much excess value out of their clients as possible, rather than reaching a settlement that benefits both parties.
To skirt this issue, there is an alternative to divorce court that, while it doesn’t leave everyone happy, it does have a higher chance at providing an equitable outcome. That alternative is mediation, where a neutral third party discusses the issue with the aggrieved parties and brings the issue to a settlement that both can agree to.
If you are in Orange County and are in need of divorce mediation specialists, look no farther than McNamee Mediations, a local Santa ana firm that specializes in divorce mediations for both complex and convoluted cases, and those that are more straight forward. The firm has been providing divorcing couples with more equitable outcomes for decades, and their long list of glowing testimonials points to their skills in this regard.
Katerina Hencova has sent many of her clients facing divorce to the firm, and has gotten nothing but positive feedback from them:
“As a financial planner, I see my clients go through a number of changes in their lives and sometimes it includes a separation/divorce. Mediation is the far better option when dissolving a marriage as it puts a lot less strain not only on the finances but also the emotions of everyone involved. This is where Colleen McNamee stands out. As an attorney-mediator, she is extremely knowledgeable in her field, has two decades of experience, but also truly cares about her clients. Something that cannot be taught in law school is the gift of empathy and caring for others, which translates into achieving fair and equitable results for couples. Thanks to her very strong skill set and the services she’s able to offer, she remains a neutral counsel to both parties throughout the process, and the Agreements she drafts are far superior to any other divorce mediator I have seen! My clients have come out feeling like they were treated fairly, received their equitable shares, and can now move forward with their lives onto their next chapters.”
Katerina Hencova, Google Review
Lisa Nguyen, a client, has gone through with her divorce and her experience left some positive impressions on her:
“If there is such thing as a Divorce Angel, then Colleen McNamee is it. More than an attorney with so much experience in family law, I believe Colleen’s life purpose is to mitigate as much pain as possible for the divorce couple. Having gone through a divorce, I am so thankful that we each didn’t have our own lawyer. If you have young children like I do, you must consider mediation as your first option. Colleen will address every concerns and legal ramifications and will make sure both parties feel heard and fairly treated. She gives couples a chance for a more successful co-parenting relationship. Do yourself a favor and reach out to her first before hiring an attorney.”
Lisa Nguyen, Google Review
Not all divorces end acrimoniously, and the tendencies of divorce court may force a more negative relationship with your previous spouse than you intend to. If you want a more equitable separation that leaves your friendly relationship with your spouse intact, contact McNamee Mediations:
McNamee Mediations
+19492233836
4590 MacArthur Blvd Suite 500, Newport Beach, CA 92660
Couples never plan for the end because it feels like setting an expiration date. The only issue with this kind of thinking is that planning involves honest input from both parties where an exit only takes the withdrawal of one side of the bridge. When that spanned gap comes crashing down, life savings, businesses, homes, and families can come crashing down with it. Enter the seemingly impossible role of the mediator. In this analogy think of a mediator as a cross between Atticus Finch and Batman. Part consoling but fair legal expert and part covert ninja that saves the day by shedding light on the unflattering parts of life. A mediator’s role is to represent both sides of the life altering conflict to come to a mutually agreeable and ultimately healing solution. Sound impossible? Practically every couple that ends in court seems to think the same thing. Skepticism is not unwarranted as successful mediation is not a difference in paperwork or a 3 step panacea. Successful mediation requires a truly talented divorce mediator.
This week’s featured business does just that. With the divorce rate on the climb from big cities like Metropolis all the way to little embankments like Smallville and Sanborne County, the need is met with a variety of solutions and none are graceful or amicable like this family law mediation firm. Take for example how ugly a divorce can get between court appearances, family and friend personal testimonies and public recounting of embarrassing issues. Want your gambling problem or extra-marital affair to become public record? The mixed martial arts arena of divorce court is glad to make that public record. As they say, what happens in Vegas stays in divorce court. Consider the alternative of private mediation. In divorce mediation, all proceedings take place in the privacy of an office and remain strictly confidential. What’s more the division of assets doesn’t become 50/50 split – between the husband’s lawyers and the wife’s lawyers. Typical mediation costs 1/10th the price of divorce court.
The obvious benefits don’t ring through unless the mediation is a success though. There is a wide chasm between what some mediators would call a success and what success means to this certified family law mediation attorney. Couples are baffled by the outcome that they walk away from a divorce feeling heard, relieved and even optimistic about the future. That takes a talented attorney and mediator to navigate the most challenging life event many couples ever have to face and reposition it as a new beginning.
Her rave reviews speak volumes about what she does but more than that, they speak to the level of gratitude her clients feel toward her that they would publicly share their experience with a divorce attorney. Stand outside the doors of a divorce court sometime and you will find yourself dodging daggers being stared at the opposing parties. There’s nothing “5 stars” about the experience. While no divorce is going to be pleasant, the best a couple can possibly hope for is to be mutually represented by a family law mediator that cares about the well-being of both parties and the success of the family unit. We at the clute institute are proud to report that in the otherwise bleak world of marriage dissolution – there is a beacon of reconciliation and balance in mediation.
